Published by Dockery Printing Company 
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Copyrighted by Horatio S. Jones 

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•CI.D (51247 
.m 12 1T22 



THE CRACKER 

A ONE-ACT MELODRAMA 

Country home of a physician during the Civil War in 
western Missouri, near the Kansas line. A kitchen and bed- 
room are the only rooms shown. The bedroom is in left 
upper, seen through a practical door. Visible through this 
door are to be seen the upper part of bed and an old-fash- 
ioned bureau, etc. In the kitchen, right center, is a practical 
door leading outside. Left center, a practical window. In 
right lower an old-fashioned cook stove. Right upper, old 
fireplace, the chimney of which is so constructed that at 
the proper time it can be thrown down. This is done when 
a shell is supposed to strike it during a battle between Quan- 
trel's men and Union troops. In center of kitchen is a table. 
Chairs about the room. Between kitchen door and window 
is a shelf on which is placed a small Bible. Lower left, in 
wall, is a secret door concealing a cabinet in which is a 
loaded shotgun (loaded only with powder). In kitchen floor 
there is a door leading down into cellar. 

Place — Western Missouri near Kansas line. Time — 
Summer. Time of Day — About one-half hour before sunset. 
The light shining through kitchen window is in the begin- 
ning ruddy, gradually fading, and it becomes sufficiently 
dark before action of play is finished, that candles have to be 
lighted. 

CAST OF CHARACTERS. 

MOLLIE PADGET A "cracker" from the mountains of 

Georgia, who speaks always in a dead 
level tone of voice. 

Dr. Compton A physician. 

Mrs. Compton _ The doctor's wife. 

Captain Welborne U. S. A. 

Joe Chedister Confederate spy. 

Cynthia - - Colored servant — about 14 years old. 

Two Soldiers U. S. A. 

Scene I. Kitchen in home of Dr. Compton. Bedroom seen 
through open door, left upper. 

Mrs. Mollie Padget (Discovered working about kitchen 

talking to Cynthia) "Cynthy, go on to 
that spring and git a bucket of fresh 
water. I told you hafer 'nour 'go an 
you ain't gone yit." 

Cynthia "Yessum, Miss Padget, I'm goin' tor- 

rectly (Bus. playing with a rag doll 
which has two painted faces, one cry- 
ing, the other laughing.) 



2 Act I. Scene I. 

Mrs. Padget Yes — j'^ou're goin', you're slower than 

sorghum merlasses in cold weather. 
Niggers ain't fitten for nuthin nohow. 
I work harder en any slave. Don't no 
soorner git one meal dun then it's time 
to git anuther. Go on now an' git thet 
water." 

Cynthia: "Yessum, I hears you (throws doll down. 

Goes to window, leans out, then turns to 
Mrs. Padget.) Whut you all reckons 'mat- 
ter wid them horses 'way ovah yonder in 
the back pasture? They act like they's 
sceered of sumthin'." 

Mrs. Padget: Go on, now, an' git thet water; I cain't 
funter 'roun here all day wastin' time on 
skeered horses." 

Cynthia: (Still looking out of window and turning to 

talk to Mrs. P.) "Huh! Looks mighty fun- 
ny. I dun see heaps of dus risin 'way down 
the road. 'Spect it's sum more of them long 
horn ole cattle. I shore is 'fraid uv them. 
Wish Mr. Barnes would quit bringing them 
'long here." 

Mrs. Padget: "Ain't you never goin' after that water?" 

Cynthia: "Shore I is. But whut I'm goin' to do if 

one uv them ole long horns gits after me? 
I'm 'fraid, Miss Padget, I shore is." 

Mrs. Padget: (Turns to Cynthia, hands on hips, angry) 
"Ain't you goin'?" 

Cynthia: (Leaves window, stands facing Mrs. P.) 

" 'Scuse me, Miss Padget, ye shore got 
water on de brain. But I heard the doctor 
tellin' Mrs. Compton sumthin' 'bout you 
worsser then that. He dun said if you 
didn't quit thinkin' so much 'bout water 
you wuz goin' to get Amphibilous. He said 
dat, he shore did. I ain't trying to skeer 
you, but he said dat." 

Mrs. Padget: "I guess I'll git it, whatever it is. But if 
you don't go on to that spring you'll think 
you got somethin' worsser than that." 

(Voice off stage) Synthia, come here. 

Cynthia: (Laughing) "I'm goin' afteh dat water in 

jus' a minit. Miss Padget." (Exits laugh- 
ing. Mrs. P. looks her disgust.) 

Mrs. Padget: "That little imp works harder tryin' to keep 
out uv work than anybody I ever see. Well, 



Mrs. Compton 

Mrs. Padget: 
Mrs. Compton 



Mrs. Padget: 



Mrs. Compton 
Mrs. Padget: 



Act I. Scene I. 3 

well, she has plenty uv company an' they 
ain't all black, either. Work like a nigger 
(disgusted). Huh, some folks think that's 
workin' mighty hard (sneeringly). I work 
hard 'cause I hafter to keep from goin' 
plumb crazy. When I git to thinkin' uv 
whut alls happened to me an mine, I git 
almost distracted. 0, if I ever meet agin 
that Joe Chedister, I'll thank God Almighty 
for that. (Bus.) Ain't nuthin' so bad as 
war; ain't nuthin' it don't tear up, bust up 
and reternally ruin. It's been a hell to me. 
(Looks at bucket on stand.) Now, there's 
that bucket — empty." 

(Enter Mrs. (Compton.) 
"I thought you were talking to someone, 
Cousin Mollie." 
Wuz — talking to myself." 
(Laughing) "I see. Why do you insist on 
doing this work? It is too much for you — 
and when you came here you know I told 
you you did not have to work." 
"I don't do much, but to set 'round and do 
nuthin', I would go crazy. When I work, 
I dont' think so much 'bout my troubles. I 
ain't got no close kin no more, but you all — 
all killed endurin the war. (Looks steadily at 
floor but shows no emotion.) My man was 
called to jine in the war. He was home 
oncet an a devil by the name of Joe Ched- 
ister reported him a deserter an' before he 
could clar hisself he wuz tuck out by a gang 
of copper heads an' shot. These copper heads, 
I guess, wuz named after a snake, the one 
that strikes without warnin' 'cause he's too 
cowardly to give warnin'. These copper 
heads wuz too cowardly an' onery to jine 
the army, but staid to home claimin' to be 
sick an' other lies, an' tuck on theirselves to 
run the neighborhood. If ever I meet up 
with that man I'm goin' to kill him as sure 
as a gun is dangerous." 
"0, Cousin Mollie, you wouldn't. You must 
never think of such a thing." 
"You all don't know whut 'tis to suffer 
whut I have suffered. But the Good Book 
says, "An eye for an eye an' a tooth for 
a tooth," an' the man that took my hus- 
band's life must pay for it with his own." 



4 Act I. Scene I. 

Mrs. Compton: "That is from the Old Testament, Cousin 
Mollie. With the new dispensation of Jesus 
Christ this was displaced with the teaching 
"That if thy enemy smite thee on one 
cheek turn to him also the other," Humil- 
ity is the prime article." 
Mrs. Padget: Don't know nuthin' 'bout dispensation, but 
I have the place whut I speak of marked, 
an' it is in the Bible. (Goes to shelf and 
gets Bible, opens it and shows to Mrs. C.) 
An' I'm goin' to keep my faith in the Book. 
(Clasps hands over breast with book against 
breast.) An' when the time comes ain't 
nuthin' goin' to hold me back. I dreamed 
las' night that the coward come here and 
struck me an taunted me with havin' my 
husband killed. Ain't no use to worry 'bout 
it now, whut is to be will be, an' ain't 
nuthin' this side of Hades goin' to stop it." 
Mrs. Compton: (Puts arm around Mrs. Padget — comforts 
her) "As it only makes you unhappy, we 
will not speak of it again. You are here, 
and Chedister, doubtless, is in the moun- 
tains of Georgia, and you will, perhaps, 
never see him again." 
Mrs. Padget: "I tell you Pm going to meet him again, 
if the whole world wuz between him an' me, 
we will meet some day. (Bus.) Well, I 
must get to work. I want to have supper 
'gin the doctor gets home, I know he will 
be hungry an tii'ed after riding all day to 
see sick folks. He rides when no other doc- 
tor will. He ain't skeered of nuthin'. 
Strange what good men some can be an' 
whut onery cusses some others kin be. You 
go on out o' here. I can do more work 
alone. (Bus. Exit Mrs. C.) 
Mrs. Padget goes about her work grumbling. Distant 
shooting is heard which rapidly becomes more and more vio- 
lent. Every second or two a cannon shot booms out. The 
kitchen door is suddenly thrown open and a man, ragged, 
dirty, with several weeks' growth of beard on his face, show- 
ing fear and excitement, rushes into the kitchen. Mrs. Pad- 
gt calmly surveys him. 
Mrs. Padget: Well, are you lookin' for them soldiers? I 

hear 'em fightin' out there. (Points.) 
Joe Chedister: "God, no. Hide me, quick. For the love 
of heaven, don't let them know I am here. 



Mrs. Padget: 
Joe Credister: 



Mrs. Compton: 
Mrs. Padget: 

Cynthia : 



Mrs. Padget: 
Cynthia : 



Mrs. Compton 
Mrs. Padget: 



Act I. Scene I. 5 

I am an innocent man, but if those soldiers 
ever get me they will murder me in cold 
blood." 

"0, I thought they wuz friends o' yours." 
"Please, please hide me. (Rings his hands; 
shows abject cowardice. She contemptu- 
ously goes to a door in floor of kitchen, 
raises it and points to steps. He vanishes 
down the steps. She lets down the door, 
stands perplexed, and as if trying to recall 
something.) 

(Enter Mrs. Compton, followed by Cyn- 
thia. Mrs. Compton runs to window, turns 
excitedly to Mrs. Padget.) 
"0, Cousin Mollie, come here. Look! What 
do you think it means?" 
(Crosses to window, looks out intently.) "I 
guess it's Quantrel's bushwhackers and 
Union Troops fightin'. I heard 'em when 
they commenced." 

(Has been much excited, running about, 
looking out the window and looking anxious- 
ly in the faces of the two women. She 
takes another look out the window.) "I dun 
tole you I seen dus' rising down the road." 
(Excitedly.) 

"Yes, an' you said it was long horns, too." 
"Yessum. Well, I ain't got no time to 
argufy 'bout it. Dem soldiers is a goin' to 
be here in a minit, an' Ise goin' to be sum- 
mers else." (She runs out kitchen door, 
slamming it behind her.) 
"0, what shall we do?" 
"I don't reckon we can do anything. (Turns 
away, wearily.) I got to go about my work. 
I thought when I got out of Georgia I would 
git out of the war, but it don't seem any 
better here. (Goes about her work with no 
excitement or apparent concern. The can- 
non still booms out every few seconds but 
she pays absolutely no attention. A shell 
strikes the comer of the chimney, knocking 
down brick, mortar and woodwork. Mrs. 
Compton screams and hides her face. Mrs. 
Padget is not excited, but as she takes in 
the dirt and rubbish becomes angry.) "Now 
who in the devil did that? Now I got to 



6 Act I. Scene I. 

clean up this dirt. I know I work harder 
then any slave." (The firing becomes less 
and less severe. Mrs. Compton goes to the 
window again and quickly turns away with 
a frightened face.) 

Mrs. Compton: "0, Cousin Mollie! Come, look! Soldiers! 
They are coming to the house," (She 
rushes into bedroom and is seen kneeling 
at bedside in prayer. Mrs. Padget makes 
no reply; shows no concern. Goes on about 
her work. The door of kitchen is thrown 
open, and in walks an officer and two 
men.) 

Mrs. Padget: (Looks at soldiers calmly.) "Now, who are 
you, and whut do you want?" 

Officer: "You can see who we are. We are looking 

for ammunition." (Officer orders soldiers 
to search for ammunition.) 

Mrs. Padget: (Looks on with expression of disgust.) 
"How did you know we had any ammuni- 
tion?" 

Officer: "Never mind how we found it out. We 

know you have some hidden here." 

Mrs. Padget: "Hah! We are going to be much obliged 
to you if you find any. The doctor was, 
only yesterday, wishin' he had some. 
Wanted to kill som.e squirrels. Will you 
give us a little if you find some?" 

Officer: "Go in that room and search it, (Turns to 

Mrs. Padget.) "Why, most assuredly," 
(Sarcastically,) 

Mrs. Padget: (She bows,) "But you don't need to tear 
down the place to find it." 

(The soldiers and officer pass into bedroom, Mrs, Compton 

rises to her feet as they approach and meets them at the 

door.) 

Mrs. Compton: "What do you want? You are soldiers in 
uniform, we are helpless women and de- 
fenseless." 

Officer: (Politely but rather sarcastically.) "We 

merely wish to make a search of your house, 
madam, for amunition." (Mrs. Padget ap- 
proaches door and eyes them intently, but 
turns away. The soldiers go about search- 
ing, throwing things about promiscuously. 
They act very solemn as they proceed, while 
Mrs. Compton, who has plucked up a little 



Act I. Scene I. 



Mrs. Compton: 



Officer 



Mrs, Compton: 



Officer 



courage, scolds and upbraids them. They 
merely grin at one another and go on about 
their work. They throw the bedclothes on 
the floor and tear things up generally. The 
officer turns to the bureau and commences 
to search it. Mrs. Compton goes to him 
and pleads with him not to disturb her 
things.) 

"Please do not disturb my things. Why do 
you act this way? You know there is no 
munition here, or else I would give it to 
you rather than have the house torn up this 
way. (Goes to officer who has commenced 
his search of bureau.) Please, sir, leave 
those things alone. There is nothing there 
that can be of the least interest to you." 
(The officer smiles and proceeds with his 
search. He comes upon a regalia, the insig- 
nia of a high priest of the Chapter of a 
Masonic lodge.) 

(Holding up regalia.) "Does this belong to 
a member of your family?" 
"It belongs to my husband. Please put it 
back." 

(Folds the regalia slowly, thoughtfully, and 
gives it a little pat.) "Madam, I ask your 
pardon. I would not harm a hair of your 
head, for the world. (Turns to soldiers.) 
ATTENTION. (Soldiers with astonishment 
come to attention.) Place all the things 
in this room as you found them. Corporal, 
place a man at each corner of this house, 
and shoot anyone trying to enter. ATTEN- 
TION! March!" (They pass out through 
the kitchen. As the officer leaves the room 
behind soldiers, he stops at door, turns and 
soldierly salutes Mrs. Compton. Exits. The 
bayonets can be seen through the window 
as the soldiers pass to and fro. All the time 
this scene has been transpiring Mrs. Padget 
goes about her work unexcitedly, occasion- 
ally looking with some little interest at the 
soldiers as they search the house. Her ex- 
pression is not friendly, but when they 
march out, she looks at the officer with a 
friendly expression. A bugle sounds "Fall 
in." Mrs. Compton runs to kitchen win- 
dow.) 



8 



Act I. Scene I. 



Mrs. Compton: (From window.) "They are going. Thank 
heaven. That officer had more manhood 
than some I have met. I hope his experi- 
ence here may cause him to think before 
invading another home. What will become 
of us if this war lasts much longer?" 
Mrs. Padget: "We will all be killed, I reckon, and then 
I guess they will have to quit. In the 
South they most always left smoking ruin«i 
to show where they had called. Only chim- 
bleys was lef standing. You have just 
commenced to understand whut we all had 
to suffer. I hope to the Almighty you 
won't have to learn it in the same way." 
(Mrs. Compton looks upwards, shakes her head, slowly goes 
into bedroom, closing door. The ruddy light coming through 
window has gradually faded and the room becomes dark 
enough for candles. Mrs. Padget gets two and lighting them 
places one on table and other on shelf. Enter Mrs. Comp- 
ton. Just as she enters there is a knock at the kitchen door. 
She crosses to Mrs. Padget as if for protection.) 



Mrs. Padget: 

Cynthia : 
Mrs. Padget: 

Cynthia : 
Mrs. Compton 

Cynthia : 
Mrs. Compton: 

Cynthia : 

Mrs. Padget: 

Mrs. Compton: 



Mrs. Padget 
Cynthia : 



"Who are you and whut do you want?" 
(The door opens slowly and Cynthia, grin- 
ning, peeps into room.) 
"Ain't you all dead yet?" 
You onery little devil, where have you 
been?" 

"Down in the cawn fiel'." 
"What were you going to do in the corn 
field?" 

"Coin' to stay dar 'til de war wuz over." 
(Laughing.) "What were you going to live 
on?" 

"Rosen years an spring watah." (Enters — 
closing door.) 

"Well, now as you dun gone an' located that 
spring, go on back and get a fresh bucket 
of water." 

"In a few minutes she shall go, Cousin 
Mollie. Cynthia, go and fix up that room. 
Clean up some of the dirt those soldiers 
left." 

"All right, but don't be long about it." 
(Giggling.) "Yessum, Miss Padget, jus' 
soon as I git dis room fixed up." (Exits 
giggling. Mrs. Compton follows her in 
room and shuts door.) 



Act I. Scene I. 9 

(As soon as Mrs. Compton and Cynthia leave the kitchen 
the cellar door is slowly and cautiously raised and the eyes 
of the spy, Joe Chedister, are seen gleaming in the candle 
light.) 

Joe Chedister: "Woman, have all those soldiers gone?" 

Mrs. Padget: "You think so ur you never would a raised 
that door." 

Joe Chedister: "I thought I heard the bugle. Just wanted 
to be sure. (Comes out of cellar, closing 
door. His attitude changes; he becomes 
insolent, brutal and unreasonable. "How 
soon are you going to get me something 
to cat?" (Roughly.) 

"I will git you a sandwich." 

"Sandwich, hell ; I want a square meal." 

"My supper is cooking, been so much hap- 
pened here ain't had time to do nuthin'." 

(He goes up to her and pushes her toward 
the stove.) "Come on and get me something 
to eat or you will be sorry for it. I am a 
desperate man." 

"Yes you wuz, when them soldiers wuz after 
you." 

"Do you think I could fight a whole regi- 
ment?" 

"You bet I don't. A man who will fight a 
a woman won't fight even one man, let 'lone 
a regimint." 

"Shut up and get busy with my supper. 
(She places some food on table, but is not 
at all cowed or frightened. Chedister sits 
at table and eats but complains and curses 
everything given him.) This is a fine mess, 
nothing fit to eat." 
Mrs. Padget: "Where are you from?" (Peering at him.) 

Joe Chedister: "None of your damn business. Give me 
some more bread." 

Mrs. Padget: (Gets bread. Looks at him closely as she 
puts bread on table.) "Seems to me I seen 
you before." 

Joe Chedister: "Well, what about it? Why don't you learn 
how to cook? You cook like one of them 
ignorant crackers down in the mountains 
of Georgia. Look at that bread?" 



Mrs. Padget: 
Joe Chedister 
Mrs. Padget: 

Joe Chedister 



Mrs. Padget: 



Joe Chedister; 



Mrs. Padget: 



Joe Chedister 



10 

Mrs. Padget; 



Joe Chedister 



Mrs. Padget: 



Dr. Compton; 
Mrs. Padget: 



Act I. Scene I. 

"We make the best bread we kin with the 
flour we have to make it out of. If you 
don't like it, don't eat it." (She turns to 
leave the table and as she does so a sudden 
thought seems to come to her, she turns 
toward him quickly, stoops down and looks 
him in the face. Her whole manner changes. 
It is the first time she has lost her listless 
manner, her expression is one of doubt, sus- 
picion, anxiety and finally rage.) 

"What are you staring at me for? Get 
away, you old harriden." (He rises to his 
feet with an alarmed expression; throws 
table over, everything on its goes crashing 
to floor.) 

(She is not apparently excited, but has an 
expression of murderous hatred.) "I know 
you now (spoken in a dead level voice). I 
know you, Joe Chedister." (He takes a step 
backward before her menacing attitude.) 
"You coward, you had my husband killed." 
(As she says this he rushes at her. She 
does not give way before him. He grabs 
her by the throat, chokes her and strikes 
her in the face time and again. She falls 
to the floor, he catches her by the hair, 
pulls her up and strikes her down again. 
She screams but fights back viciously. She 
is pushed down on her knees; she rises and 
by the very violence of her attack alm.ost 
knocks him down. He regains his feet, 
strikes her and she is sent reeling to fall 
in left lower. Slowly she gets up, sees the 
secret door; rushes to it, tears it open and 
with a cry like a wild animal, seizes gun, 
points it at him and pulls off both barrels. 
He falls as if struck down by some heavy 
weight. She catches the gun by the barrel 
and stands crouching, looking at him with 
the expression of a tigress, ready to hit him 
with the gun should he again start toward 
her. But he lays quite still.) 

(Enter Dr. Compton.) 

(Excited.) "I heard a shot. What does 
it mean — who did it?" 

(Calmly points to body on floor.) "I did it." 



Act I. Scene I. 11 

Dr. Compton: (Kneels beside body, makes hasty examina- 
tion.) "God, how he bleeds!" (After pause, 
rises to feet.) "His whole throat is blown 
away — he is quite dead." 

(Enter Mrs. Compton and Cynthia, showing fear. They 
stand speechless. The doctor goes to them and they all look 
at Mrs. Padget with an expression of awe.) 

Mrs. Padget: (Looking at blood on floor.) "Now I got 
to scrub this floor again." (Looking at Cyn- 
thia, who stands wild-eyed and speechless.) 
"Cynthy, you never got that bucket of 
water." 

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